Have you heard of zulily?

Have you heard of zulily?

Can you say, awesome?! It's my newest obsession. They offer daily deals for moms, babies, and kids! Most of their offers are from small businesses, and they even have a bunch of great organic and handmade stuff! Like Groupon, you sign up your email (free membership) and they send you deals each morning. Some expire that day others are good for several days. This may be a dangerous website for me!

If you have kids, or kids you shop for, you really should check it out. CLICK HERE to sign up!

P.S. It doesn't hurt that Lily is in their name! :)

Car Seat Survey

Hey all you moms and dads out there. Lily is quickly outgrowing her carrier car seat. She is way too heavy to carry around in it, rarely falls asleep in the car anymore, and is just getting too big! It's time for us to look into a new seat for her. I'd like a convertible one so that she can still be rear facing for at least a year. We are going to have to have at least two, so I'd prefer them not be ridiculously expensive. Do you have any recommendations? What are your thoughts on new versus used? Anyone have one they are ready to move out of?

Time to Babyproof!

Well, it happened. We failed as parents. At least in part. Two nights ago, while we were cleaning the kitchen and cooking dinner, Lily was in her walker tooling around the family room. She found her way to the lamp by the couch, and, before Josh could get to her to stop her, she pulled it over. It shattered on the floor leaving her standing in a pile of broken glass. Yikes! Luckily there were no injuries, but it certainly was an eye opener.

It seems that our little girl is growing up. She is becoming strong and mobile quickly. A few weeks ago, she couldn't get around at all. Now, by rolling or scooting, she can get wherever she wants to go. She seems to know what she wants (usually things she shouldn't have: electrical cords, DVD's, fish food, etc) and goes after it! It's time for us to get started baby proofing.

At first Josh said he thought we didn't need locks and such, but could just teach what to do and not to do. I think there is a bit of truth in that. My nanny and I had a conversation today about telling her no and replacing the off limits item with something good for her to play with. Still, I think there are some things we need to do!

Last night we bought a new TV stand that has doors that keep all of our electronics away from her little hands. Our old one was pretty unsafe because it had a glass top that didn't attach which she could easily pull off when she starts pulling up, which she is already starting to do. We've put plug covers in all of the outlets she can reach. Tomorrow my nanny is bringing some cabinet locks and things that she has left over, but we'll still need a few more and gates for the stairs.

Anyone have any baby proofing advice? Does anyone have a cabinet lock or gate style that they like?

Teen Moms

The High School where my church meets has quite a few students who either have children or are expecting children. As part of our ongoing efforts to really be part of the school community, we have recently started looking for ways to support these girls. As soon as this was mentioned in church one Sunday, I teared up and knew that I was supposed to help. Today I decided to take the day off work to attend our first event, a "baby shower".

We took tons of diapers and gently used clothes, along with lunch for the girls. I wasn't sure what to expect. While these women are moms, they are also still high school students. The counselor had to go and "remind" many of them to attend, but once they did, what happened was beautiful. I think that being together in one space helped them see that they are not alone. Although shy at first, they soon dived into searching for clothes for their little ones and conversation with each other about motherhood.

It was obvious who was expecting and who was already a mother, and not just because of the belly. There was a noticeable maturity among those who already have a baby they are taking care of. I'm not surprised. Being a mom brings with it a whole new set of concerns and joy and until you experience it, you really have no idea what you are in for.

I was somewhat surprised to see one of the fathers come with his girlfriend to the shower. I'm proud of that young man even though I don't know him. It can't be easy for a teenage boy to come into a room full of girls looking at baby clothes, heck, I don't think Josh would have done it. It really got me thinking that all of these baby's have dads. Perhaps we need to look more into ways that we can support them as well. Being a dad isn't easy either and there is lots of evidence out there about how important having a good dad is.

I hope that seeing us there, struggling with our own babies fussing, being hungry, spilling things, etc. they see that no one has it all together. The point is that we all realize that parenthood is a challenge, but that having people, be they your peers or elders (wow...I hate that word, I am not old enough to be an elder, but I couldn't think of another word that would work), to talk about all of the struggles and joys with makes the whole journey a bit easier and a lot more fun. I know I'm blessed to have lots of other moms in my life.

Overall, I can not imagine being a high school student and a mother. Motherhood is a tough gig even when you are "grown up". I'm impressed that these girls are finishing school and doing their best to be good moms. I want to do anything I can to support that. We have plans to do more "showers" in the future as well as large group outings and a mentor program. I'm so excited to see what God does in the lives of these young girls and their little ones.

Mama

This past week, Lily turned 8 months old and started saying mama. The thing is, she only says it when she is upset. When she is happy, she chants "dadadadada", but when she is upset, she screams "mama". My nanny says it's because she wants comforting and mamas are for comfort, whereas dadas are for fun.

This got me thinking. Perhaps mama is a natural innate sound that a baby human makes when in need of comfort, much like a baby kitten meow or a baby bird chirp. Perhaps that is why the first words used for mother are so similar around the world. Interesting!

It also made me think that perhaps I underestimate my baby girl. Perhaps she really does know who mama is and calls for me when she wants comforting. She certainly does say dada more when he is around. Not exclusively, but more. Mama, however, seems to come out more when I'm not there than when I am. Who really knows. I just like that she says it! :)

Post Script to Overwhelmed

Warning: Boys, you probably don't want to read this post.

So...you know how I was feeling so overwhelmed last week. It was really rough. I had lots of tears and fears. Turns out...there is a good chance it was all hormonal. After "Aunt Flow's" visit with her red suitcase over the weekend, I feel so much calmer and more myself. It's amazing how that happens. I think I had forgotten about her. That is one big benefit to being pregnant!

Overwhelmed

Do you ever feel overwhelmed? I think I thought I felt overwhelmed before I had Lily. I had no idea. Don't get me wrong. I love her. I love being her mom. I love Josh, I love being his wife. I love my job, I love my friends, I love my family, I love my house. I have lots of things that I love, but all of those things also bring with them responsibilities.

Last night I hit a wall. I felt very overwhelmed by all of my responsibilities. The thought of having one more little thing to do was just too much. The last two weeks have been incredibly stressful at work. With testing, remediation, and retesting, I feel like I've spent two weeks torturing seventh graders. That is a responsibility I don't want and don't like, but I still have to do it. There have been a ton of details to work out and very limited time to do it. It has been perhaps the most stressful week of my professional life to date. Because it was so stressful, I came home exhausted. I played with Lily and took care of her, but had little energy for anything else. Thus, my other responsibilities suffered.

I just feel like I have so many responsibilities that I'm doing a crappy job of all of them. Last night, out of shear frustration, I decided to make a list. I made a list of all of my responsibilities. The ones that I do every day, the ones I do once a week, and the ones I do every now and then. I'm not sure why I made the list. Maybe because naming a thing makes it easier to deal with. Maybe so I could show it to people and they would understand all I feel responsible for (which I did). Maybe so I would hopefully find things I can cross of that I'm not really responsible for (which I didn't). I'm not sure if the list was helpful.

My only solace is that I only have ten more days of work and then all of the stress and responsibility related to that are gone. Suddenly I'll have eight more hours a day to take care of my other responsibilities. June 11th can't get here soon enough. I just pray I make it!

A Weekend Full of Adventure!

This past weekend was full of fun family adventures. On Saturday, we went for our first ever family hike. We put Lily in the backpack we got from the REI garage sale and set off along the Eno River to Bobbitt's Hole. It was really a lovely hike, although the cicadas were so loud at times we had to shout to hear each other over them. I carried Lily out to the swimming hole. Unbelievably, she fell asleep in the backpack and slept a good chunk of the way. I thought it would be tough to carry her at first because my balance was off, but I quickly got used to it, and even enjoyed it. Bobbitt's hole was beautiful and we definitely plan to return and swim there soon. When Lily woke up we had a little snack and then headed back with Josh carrying her. All it all, it was a lovely way to spend an afternoon.

Then, yesterday, I took Lily on her first trip to the pool. I got her all dressed in her rash guard swim suit, plopped on her hat, and slathered my pale baby in sunscreen (any tips for putting that stuff on their face). At first she was not a fan of the cold water, but as I eased her in and let her get used to it, she began to enjoy it and even splash around a bit. I put her in her awesome covered float and she immediately kicked back with her feet up and relaxed. She also quite enjoyed trying to grasp the water with her pincher grip and drink it! A few times she splashed herself in the face and giggled. It was super cute.

I am seriously looking forward to summer. Three more weeks and I'm home with my baby! We are going to have such fun!

My Birthday

Yesterday was my birthday. My mom sent me a message saying she remembered the day I was born, and it really got me thinking. Why, on our birthdays, do we not call our Mom's and thank them! I know the idea is that we are celebrating that we survived another year of life, but to me that is sort of morbid. I think that instead, we should use this day to say thank you and celebrate the person who gave us life!

I know that for me, the day Lily was born is one I will never forget. When I celebrate with her, I know I will remember and celebrate my own joy as well. I think both my mom and I have a special day worthy of celebrating every May 19th. So, every year, from now on, on my birthday I'll be calling my mom to thank her and celebrate with her!

Another Cool Birthday Idea: I have a friend who's mom calls her every year at the time of her birth to wish her a happy birthday! I think that is an awesome tradition. So, this year, at 11:41pm on September 28th, I'll be whispering to Lily "Happy Birthday" as she sleeps!

The Pinch

Apparently developing a strong pincher grasp is a developmental milestone. Lily has certainly mastered it! It's really fun to watch her pick up her puffs and put them in her mouth. She also tries to pick up almost anything including carpet and buttons of shirts with her little fingers, super cute!

The only problem is that with this new grasp, she has also learned how to pinch skin! She has started this annoying little habit of pinching me in my arm pit when I'm nursing her. It really hurts. Her little fingers are super sharp and it really hurts. It's worse if I'm just wearing a nursing tank and she can get bare skin (which is usually the case first thing in the morning), but she also pinches through a shirt!

I've tried telling her no and holding her hand, but she gets frustrated. I've tried giving her a toy to hold instead of pinching, but she usually drops it and resumes the pinching. When she isn't pinching my under arm, she reaches for my face. I'm just not sure what to do about it. Any suggestions?

I was telling a friend about it and she says that her son slaps her belly with his free hand while he's nursing. Hilarious! Do any of you have any funny stories of what your babies do while nursing?

First Words!

Ok...so I'm pretty sure Lily said "da da" on Thursday night. She had been a bit sick all week and was pretty fussy at bed time. Josh was holding her and trying to soothe her and saying "daddy loves Lily" (one of his favorite sayings which has accompanying hand motions, so cute!).

She looked right at him and said "blah blah". We both sort of smiled and said "da da" back to her. She repeated it a little clearer "dlah dlah". This continued for a while with us saying it and her repeating. It was awesome!

The next morning she did it again. She has said it a few more time since then, maybe not quite and maybe not totally intentional, but still...first words! Yay!

To Pump or Not To Pump, That is the Question

Well, it's not really a question anymore. I made a decision. I can no longer pump twice a day at work. There just isn't time. When I had a student teacher, it was much easier. Now that I'm in charge of all classroom responsibilities, and especially with the oncoming testing, there is just no way for me to do it twice a day.

I've been struggling with it for a few weeks. Then, on Saturday, I hung out with a friend who is also nursing a little one. She has decided to start weening her five month old daughter exclusively to bottles. She has a two year old as well and just can't find time for all those feedings during the day when her baby nurses forty-five minutes, but takes a bottle in ten! Her candid discussion of her struggle helped me realize that there is absolutely nothing wrong with changing "the plan" if it's what is best for you and baby.

My plan was to give her breast milk exclusively for a whole year. I've already had to let go of that a bit by giving her formula supplements when she was tiny and from time to time when we are out and it was most convenient. At seven months old, giving her one bottle of formula a day is no big deal. I still plan to nurse her before work, give her one pumped bottle during the day, and nurse her when I'm home in the evening. We will still have that special time before I put her to bed. She will still get way more breast milk than formula.

When I think about how much simpler it makes my work day, I have no idea why I didn't make this decision earlier. I am a bit sad, but overall I am relieved. My only hope is that when I'm home in the summer, my milk will come back so that I don't have to give her formula then. I guess that remains to be seen.

**By the way, check out this pewter breast pump from the 1830's! How grateful am I for my dual battery powered one!

The Soothing Phenomenon

Last night Josh and I had dinner with some friends who have a two week old baby and I got some new insight into what I call the soothing phenomenon. You all know what I'm talking about. This is the phenomenon when the new parents are at the end of their rope. They have tried everything they can think of to soothe their fussy little one. They are sure nothing will work and she will never stop crying. Then, a friend stops by. After just a few minutes in this friends arms, the baby is calm and asleep. The new parents are relieved and frustrated at the same time.

This happened for Josh and I shortly after Lily was born. We were struggling, she was fussing, and God sent Rae to save us. Rae, who has a self proclaimed dislike of babies, took Lily and almost instantly soothed her. I was relieved, but baffled. The same thing happened when my friend Fiona came over. I watched them and tried to figure out what they did, but it didn't work for me. I didn't understand. Now, though, after soothing my friends baby last night, I think I get it.

It has nothing to do with the friends expertise. The baby most definitely doesn't "like" the friend more than her parents. I think it has to do with being relaxed. Every knew parent knows that their baby can sense their stress and anxiety and it makes them more fussy. Still, I think it is truly impossible not to feel stressed when you are tired and your baby is crying and you don't know why. Your friend however doesn't feel that same stress. They know they won't be up all night. They don't fear they are doing the wrong thing. They might even enjoy the fussy little bundle.

I think that is what is at the root of the soothing phenomenon. I don't know that this is really a helpful discovery though, because, as I noted, it's not really possible to relax when you are the parent. In fact, telling new parents to relax and enjoy their screaming baby is ludicrous. I think the best I can do for my friend is being willing to come when she needs me and hold the baby screaming or calm. It also can't hurt to remind her that these tough weeks are so short, even though in the middle of the storm it seems like they will never end.

My First Mother's Day!

Today is my first legitimate Mother's Day as a mom. I have to admit that I was a bit weepy most of they day. It's just that it's been such a long journey. I get caught up in the joy of having Lily that I forget what it was like before.

Last Mother's day, when I was expecting her, was exciting, but a little awkward. I was still timid about celebrating, and fearful that something bad might happen. The ones for several years before that were painful.

Today, though, all of my tears were joyful. The first tears today were as I set this morning nursing her when she woke up (she slept until 9!) and just marveling at having her in my arms.

The next were on the way to church after talking to my family and remembering some great memories with my own mom! Then there were tears during church singing "there is mourning in the night, but joy comes in the morning!" Those words just rang so true about so many aspect of motherhood!

The middle of the day was fairly tear free as we went out to lunch with friends, then Josh watched Lily so I could have a nap! Tonight Josh and I took dinner to friends who have a two week old baby. Don't get me wrong, there are some things (mainly the inconsolable crying) that I don't miss about having a tiny one, but the snuggliness is nice. Josh, knowing that I was thinking about how fast Lily is growing, just had to point out how before you know it she'll be going away to college! I can't even imagine and choose not to!

As joyful as they are, hopefully those, well actually the ones I cry as I write this, will be my last tears of the day!

Cousins!

This past weekend Lily and I went to Virginia to visit family. It was a great trip. She travels very well and it was really good to get to see everyone, even if it was brief. All of her grandparents were surprised to see how she is changing and growing up. It's funny but because I see her every day, I almost don't notice how much stronger and more active she is now.

One of the most exciting and fun parts of the weekend was watching Lily "play" with her cousin Jesse. They are starting to get to the point that they can interact. It's super cute! I've posted some pictures of them playing together.

The only issue is that Jesse is used to having Granna, Deano (What Jesse calls my parents), and Mama all to himself! At one point, when Lily was on Hillary's lap, he went over to "hug" her, but actually tried to drag Lily off of his mom's lap! (check out the look on his face in the anove picture!) When I took Lily out to tell my dad goodnight Jesse pushed her away and told her that HE was playing with Deano! When we tried to get them to have their picture taken together and Jesse refused.

He did however want her to come "sleep" in the tent with him and showed her how his puzzle and blocks work. They both enjoyed playing bumper cars with the walkers. I figure they have years of a love/hate relationship in front of them. I only pray that in the end it works out to be love!