Let's go for a Hike!

Whenever my backpacking loving father comes to visit, we must go to REI. Today was no different, except it was the annual Garage Sale. Unbeknownst to us, this yearly event, where they open up their back room and sell off all of the returned merchandise, is a pretty big deal. Apparently there was a line starting early this morning to get a number to get in, but, by the time we were there at 4pm, it was fairly cleaned out.

My dad still managed to find a pair of gently used Vasque hiking boots (which are supposedly pretty good) for $10. But the most amazing find of all was a Sherpani backpack child carrier for $35! These things usually retail for $150-$200, and the only reason it was returned is because the previous user thought it was uncomfortable. It looks like it was hardly used! It was posted at $70, but they agreed to give it to us for half price since the day was drawing to a close and apprently this was its second garage sale. We couldn't say no.

Josh and Dad have been trying for a while to convince me to go backpacking, but I have to admit I was less than interested. I would not have dreamed of paying full price for one of these packs and didn't really think we'd ever use one. After putting Lily in the pack and toting her around the store to her delight, however, I'm ready to go for a hike!

11 Hours!

I know...I know...we are crazy lucky, and I hate to gloat, but Lily has slept a glorious eleven hours the past two nights! Another new mom asked me today what our secret is and I honestly have absolutely no idea. It's funny because my last post and the accompanying polls were part of my attempt to discover the secret to baby sleep.

As previously posted, Lily had been waking up around 5:30am for a while. I then started putting her to bed earlier (around 7:30) and she was waking up around 3am. Then, Wednesday night, I went to an Ash Wednesday service and left her with Josh. He put her to bed around 7:30 and she slept until 6:30 the next morning. It was marvelous (despite the fact that I had trouble sleeping from 4am on thanks to the fact my body was used to nursing at 3). I joked that he was in charge of putting her to bed from now on!

Then last night I put her to bed around 8:30pm. She did wake up briefly and abnormally around 9:30pm (perhaps from a bad dream or gas?) and I had to briefly soothe her back to sleep, but after that she slept and I had to wake her up after 7:15 this morning to feed her before I left for work. I actually slept until my alarm clock went off. It was fantastic.

I have no idea what is making the difference. We are feeding her cereal now at least once a day, but we have done that for more than a week. We have also been reading her stories at night, but I don't really see how that could make her sleep longer. It might most possibly have something to do with swaddling. The last two nights we have left arms out when we swaddle her, but I'm not sure about the swaddle choice since it allows her to roll around more (last night while falling asleep, she did a full 360 degree rotation in her crib) and potentially, although it hasn't happened yet, roll over. I think that could be bad since she tends to get fussy when she rolls to her stomach. Josh noted, however, that it allows her to suck her thumb (another new habit which she even tries to do when nursing) and sooth herself when she wakes up or to play rather than to fuss, which is nice.

I'm sorry I don't have some magic formula to offer other moms. Heck, I wish I knew what made it happen so I can make sure we keep doing it. But, as I'm learning is true with many baby related things, there is no rhyme or reason. Whatever the reason, I am grateful for it and pray it continues!

Bed Time

I'm conducting a little bedtime research. Please give me your feedback in the polls on the right or leave a comment below. For all of the questions, imagine a six month old baby. Thanks!

Lily's Friends

There were a surprising number of babies born within a few months of Lily. Lily and I have been hanging out quite a bit with other moms with babies around Lily's age. It's is fun for all! Lily loves to grab her friends, although I'm not sure how much they love it, and I enjoy hanging out with other people who get peed on and constantly have spit up somewhere on their clothing! :)

One of my favorite things about hanging out with other moms is the affirmation that we offer each other. You can read about what to do in books. Your husband can even offer his two cents. But there is just something about another mom with a happy baby who affirms that it is ok to only wash bottles in hot soapy water and not sanitize them, or to only bathe your baby every third day.

Of course all of our babies are different. Some babies poop every day while others blow out diapers every three days. Some love being on their tummies, others their backs. Some nurse for fifteen minutes, some for thirty. At one point, this would all have concerned me and I would wonder why my baby isn't like theirs, but I'm slowly learning that it is what makes each baby unique and special, not a sign that anything is wrong with any baby.

I can't wait to watch all of these little ones grow up and develop into their own little people. Lily is a lucky girl to have so many friends!

*Pictures are of Lily and Elorie Minter and Noah & Abby Stephens respectfully. Laurel and Christine...send me pics of Hud and Autumn with Lily and I'll add them!

Super Baby Food - Super Annoying

Ok...I know some of you loved this book, but I am really struggling to read it. Don't get me wrong. It has some really good ideas and I agree with the basic premise (That store bought baby food is unnecessary and it's easy to make nutritious food for your baby at home), but I'm only five chapters in, and I have some two big issues with this book.

The first is the way it is organized, or I should say, the way it is disorganized. I don't know who the editor was for this book, but they did not do their job. On almost every page of the book, there are references to other pages. For example, on page 13 alone it says " see page 142", "see page 207", "see page 69", and "see page 427". As a reader, I have no idea if I need to go to those pages now to understand or if I should just keep reading until I get there. I also feels like the author repeats things a lot and even contradicts herself.

At one point she mentions letting a baby teeth on a carrot while on another page it is listed as a choking hazard, on another as something that shouldn't be a first food because of nitrites, and on another as not recommended because of pesticides. I actually laughed out loud when, at the end of a section on meat in the food safety section, which doesn't even mention safe meat handling, the note says not to eat rhubarb leaves. I just feel like this author needed to put in more time refining her ideas and organizing those ideas into logical sections.

The second thing that really bothers me about this book is the alarmist perspective that this author takes. Almost every page has two to three WARNING sections (yes, she uses bold all caps!). Often these contradict what she has just written. For example she does mention banana as a good first food she also says "some experts caution that the sweet taste of bananas may give your baby a "sweet tooth" and "some experts recommend against feeding a young baby bananas because of fungicides...banana skins are porous, allowing fungicides to be absorbed into the flesh."

Many of the WARNINGS are just plain common sense ("don't lean with your back on the range top or reach over the stove if you have long hair"). Others don't seem to make sense ("feeding your baby one food for too long a time may produce a sensitivity in him to that food"). There is also Chapter 5, which is an entire chapter on kitchen Safety. In this chapter she suggests that if you break a glass, after you vacuum, you should walk around bare foot to make sure you get all of the shards!

I'm not saying that all of her ideas are bad. It's just that the language she uses makes it hard for me to take her seriously. The final straw for me was this quote from the safety section:
"Do NOT keep poisonous household cleaning products in your home, grandma's home, the baby sitter's house, or any other place your child may be...see the recipes for non-toxic...cleaning products in the chapter Children are More Important than the Carpet beginning on page 474."
Seriously, I'm supposed to go to my mother-in-laws and make her get rid of her Pine Sol and Scrubbing Bubbles? It's just too extreme for me, I'm putting it down and walking away. I may come back later for some of the recipes in the back for toddler food.

Advice

I have several friends who are expecting or recently had their first baby. Last night, while feeding Lily, I began thinking about what sort of things I would want them to know. I know from personal experience, however, that a lot of people offer a lot of different advice and it should all be taken with a grain of salt. So, rather than peppering my friends with it, here is my two cents. Take it or leave it!

1. You have no idea how much you will love your baby. You might have really wanted children, like I did. You might think you love your unborn baby. You may even question how much you love her the first few days or even weeks (I did...it's normal). But a month out, or five months out, you will love her way more than you ever imagined possible.

2. Natural birth is completely possible. I think that as a laboring mother, your body knows what to do not only physically, but also mentally. I honestly do not remember much of the pain of labor at all, even despite being induced. I'm glad I did it and would do it again.

3. Stick out nursing, but formula isn't evil. I really wanted to nurse Lily. It wasn't easy, but I stuck it out, and I am super glad I did. Still, at the same time, a little formula at the beginning was just what she needed and it still makes my life easier from time to time. It has not hurt her in any way.

4. It's good to have a plan, but expect it to change. I had not planned on being induced. I had not planned on Lily being in the NICU. I had not planned on her not nursing well. I like to plan, and was very upset when things went against my plan. But, and I can say this now in hindsight, none of it was really a big deal. I have a very healthy happy baby!

5. There is no "wrong" choice to make. I would get all caught up and afraid to make a decision about what to do for Lily (especially in the bedtime realm) for fear of making the wrong decision.

6. Don't read too much. The is related to #5. I read way too many books which frequently contradicted each other. At one point I was laying in bed debating whether or not I should let Lily cry herself to sleep, and reading both La Leche League and Babywise!This left me in a state of analysis paralysis. One of the best moms I know told me her secret what that she didn't read anything, but trusted her own instincts!

7. Things will change. I think that a lot of new parent stress is caused by feeling like the way your baby is now (especially if she is now fussy, or not sleeping, or not eating) is the way she will always be. Babies change moment to moment.

8. You don't need a ton of gear, but there are a few pieces that I love. I don't really think what type of diapers (although I'd avoid Babies R Us brand) or formula (although I like organic) you use matters. You'll get clothes. You'll get toys. These items, however, I don't think I could live without!

Moby Wrap - This has been magic for Lily. When she was little and fussy, she would sleep in it when nothing else would do. Now that she doesn't love sitting in her stoller, I can take her shopping or on other outings in it and she is totally happy! I dread the day when she doesn't fit in it anymore.

Swaddleme Swaddles - Sleep magic!

Snap N Go Stroller Frame - it is so easily portable!

Bouncy Seat - it's pretty easy to move around (in the kitchen when cooking, in the bathroom when showering, etc.) and Lily loves to sit in hers.

The First Cold

Well, it had to happen sometime...Lily has a cold. She is, however, an amazingly happy sick baby. Aside from being slightly less inclined to nurse and making some strange sounds, she doesn't even act sick at all. In fact, if her pediatrician hadn't told me babies don't get seasonal allergies, I would have sworn that is what is going on.

Her symptoms have been classic allergy. She has had a stuffy nose and irritated eyes. I did end up taking her to the pediatrician because her eyes have been red and gooky, and I was afraid she had some sort of eye infection. The doctor, however, thinks that the eye stuff is just related to the cold. I just hope it doesn't get worse and doesn't last long.

5:30am

Don't get me wrong, I am NOT complaining. Compared to many people with five month old babies we get a lot of sleep. In fact, I've never really felt all that sleep deprived after the first few days. It's just that we have started having a bit of a problem. For the last few weeks Lily has been regularly waking up around 5:30am. She eats and goes right back to sleep, but still...

This is really the worst possible time for her to wake up. It's just before I have to get up for work, and just late enough that it doesn't make sense for me to feed her again before I go to work at 7:20. This means that her entire eating and sleeping schedule for the day is off a bit, and I have to worry about her having enough milk for a potential third feeding.

There have been a few days when she sleeps until 7, which is optimal. I just can't figure out how to get her to regularly sleep until 7. I've tried putting her to bed later, but it doesn't seem to correlate with her sleeping later. Right now her regular afternoon schedule includes a nap around 5:30 that last anywhere from thirty minutes to an hour and a half (I can't find a correlation with that sleep and wake up time either), the a meal, then play time until 8:30 or 9ish (or sometimes 10) and then another meal and sleep. She goes to sleep really well and sleeps good until around 5:30.

I've tried adjusting the feedings, the afternoon nap, and the bed time, but can't seem to figure out what works. Part of me is considering dropping the afternoon nap and making 7pm bedtime, with the theory that I'd rather deal with a 3am feeding than a 5:30 one, but I'm not sure it would help and putting her to bed that early really limits our family together time and makes most of it be with a grouchy sleepy baby.

I'm just not sure what to do...any suggestions?

First "Solid" Food

Today is Lily's five month birthday!

Over the weekend, we decided to give her some "solid" food. She was showing all the signs of being ready. She was grabbing for our plates and spoons, watching us eat with great interest, not seeming full after her afternoon feeding, and waking regularly at 4am after previously sleeping through the night.

I have been reading the book Super Baby Food, which recommends that if you decide to start with rice cereal, you should use Earth's Best Organic Rice Cereal because they use whole grain, not white, rice, and rather than refining all of the nutrients out and then fortifying them back in, they leave them there to begin with. We have really liked the Earth's Best formula (which is what we use when she gets formula), so we decided to go with that. I put "solid" in quotes because we mixed it four to one with breast milk which made it more liquid than really solid.

She actually did pretty well. She understands how to open her mouth for the spoon and even how to keep most of the food in. Not that we didn't have quite a mess on her bib and shirt (my mom would say it serves me right the way she put her hands in her mouth after every bite, since I apparently did that), but it wasn't as bad as I expected for her first spoon feeding. I'm not sure, however, that her little tummy was quite as ready as the rest of her. She was a rather prolific spit upper (spitter upper?) the rest of the day. This could be because we were playing a lot with her including bouncing and letting her roll over again and again, but I'm not sure. We'll give it a day or two and try again to see what happens.

Washing Bottles*

This might sound strange, but I actually enjoy washing Lily's bottles. We have made it a bit of a ritual when I come home. After I nurse her, I sit her in her bouncy seat in the kitchen while I wash all of the day's bottles. Josh asked me one day why our nanny doesn't just wash them after she uses them, and I'm sure she would if I asked her to, but I don't really want her to.

It's not that I don't think she'll do it right or anything like that. It's just that I like doing it. I think it just seems like a normal "mommy" task to me. Plus, I think washing, along with fixing her bottles, sort of connects me to her feedings even though I'm not there for them. It's just one little way that I can take care of her even when I'm not taking care of her!

*An interesting note about bottles: We've tried several different kinds, and my nanny definitely prefers the Playtex Ventaire advanced. She says she takes it better and isn't as gassy. We have moved up to medium flow nipples because it was taking her too long to eat. When I'm giving her a bottle though, she does not like the Ventaire. She struggles against it and spits it out. With me, and Josh, she likes the plain Madela one with the slow flow nipple. It may make her more gassy, but she takes it easier. I have no idea why.

PTSD at the Hospital

On Friday Lily had to go to the hospital for an ultrasound related to some strawberry hemangiomas she has (they aren't a big deal, but the doctors just want to cover all the bases). She did great, didn't even really fuss, and watched Spongebob on the TV in the ultrasound room most of the time.

I, on the other hand, struggled way more than I expected to. From the moment I started across the bridge from the parking deck to the hospital, I was on the verge of tears. Entering and walking through the building almost toppled me. The funny thing is, it wasn't because I was worried about the tests or about her now. It was because of the flood of negative memories that overtook me.

It makes me sad. When you have a baby you should have positive memories of the experience. But, from the stress of being induced, to the pain of labor (which wasn't followed by holding my precious one, but by having her whisked away), to the lonely post labor room, to visits to the cold NICU, to being told I was being discharged and she wasn't, and to that first scary night together in the sleep room, it wasn't a great experience. It was the toughest and scariest week of my life.

Walking through those halls again and smelling that hospital smell brought it all rushing back. I pushed the tears away and pushed through, but I am in no hurry to go back there anytime soon. If it wasn't for the fear that something would go wrong (like it did with Lily) I'd have my next one at home!

The Swaddle Dilemma

Since sometime during her first week home, when we discovered the magic, we have been swaddling Lily to sleep. It is amazing. She sleeps so well and I think much longer when she is in the swaddle. The time is coming, however, when we will not be able to swaddle her anymore. There is some disagreement in what I've read over how long you could/should swaddle. Some say you have to stop as soon as they can roll over so they'll have their hands out to push themselves back over if their face gets into the mattress. Others say swaddle them as long as they need it to feel comforted.

The thing is, I'm not sure how much she really needs it and how much of it is the whole me not wanting her to grow up thing. Her nanny doesn't swaddle her arms in when she puts her down for naps, and she seems to sleep pretty well. She sleeps well in the car seat or swing and isn't swaddled. Still, I'm sort of afraid to try it at night. I'm sort of in the "don't mess with a good thing" camp and she seems to be doing well in it. At night I see her sort of relax into it when I wrap her up and she is sleeping through the night almost all the time. Plus she makes a darn cute baby burrito!

Have any of you parents out there had experience with swaddling? How long did you wrap your little ones? I welcome your thoughts on the subject.

*Note the pink blanket under her head. That is there because Josh swears she told him she liked having a "pillow".

Bathing Baby

Giving a baby a bath is more difficult than you might think. I sort of snickered in the hospital when they gave us our lesson on bathing her. Truth be told, that wasn't the hard part. The hard part, in our house, was finding the right spot for baths.

When she was tiny and still getting sponge baths, those were done on the counter in the bathroom. We are fortunate to have an extra long counter top. When the umbilical stump finally fell off and I could fully bathe her, I broke out the bath seat and decided to try the kitchen sink. She hated it. Of course it could be that she just hated baths in general, but I think it has something to do with the way her seat set up out of the water letting her get cold. After two attempts at that with her screaming so much she made herself sick, I decided to try another approach.

I tried bathing her in our master bath tub. It's a big garden tub. It was a disaster. Even with the handy kneeling stool a friend gave me, my back and knees ached in about two minutes. Plus, it was really hard to reach her. I think she sensed my frustration and hated it too. I could have tried the guest bath, but there is kitty litter in that floor most of the time and I don't want to deal with that. I knew there had to be another option.

Finally, I arrived at a wonderful solution. I would get in our big tub with Lily. What a revolution that has been. She loves having mommy in there splashing around with her. She smiles, laughs, splashes, and even tries to drink the bath water. It's also super easy for me to reach her, heck, sometimes I even hold her on my lap and let her sink deep into the water. She loves it. The only tricky part is getting in and out of the tub, but usually Josh is around to help with that.

So, for all you moms (and dads) out there struggling to figure out bath time. Try the co-bath...it's fun for all!

Starting Solids

Hey moms...when did you start your baby on solids? Please vote in the poll to the right or comment below!

This past week at Lily's pediatrician appointment, I asked her doctor when we should start thinking about giving her solid food. She said really any time between now and six months. She said I would just know...which, honestly, wasn't that helpful.

Last week, when she wasn't sleeping through the night, I considered giving her some cereal mixed in with her bottle to help her sleep. When I read about it and asked some friends, however, evidence pointed to the fact that it probably wouldn't work, and I just wasn't ready to start yet

Josh is really wanting to feed her everything. Perhaps this is because he doesn't get to feed her much. Just last weekend I had to convince him to not give her part of his breakfast. I, on the other hand, waiver about it. At times I think it would be fun to give her a little cereal and see how she likes it. Other times, I dread her starting solids because it feels like it would mean less nursing, which I love.

I almost bought a box of rice cereal yesterday at the grocery store, but at the last minute I put it back! I'm just curious what other mom's did and how it worked?

Are all Mom's this Sappy?

Judging by my memories of my own mom and Josh's mom's tears every time we leave after a visit, I think the answer is yes, but, I don't think I fully understood until Lily arrived.

Last night we moved Lily to her crib in her own room for the first time. I'd been intending to do this since right after Christmas, but kept putting it off for some reason. It wasn't that I thought it would bother her. She has been pretty easy in the sleep department until this week. Perhaps that is why I was able to put it off. After this week's sleeping debacles, we decided that perhaps we should move her to keep us from waking her up. After all, she is four months old; it really was time. I'm beginning to think that my friends who put their babies in their cribs from the start, have the right idea. It's hard thing to initiate.

And, while I did appreciate not having to tip-toe quietly around my own bedroom in semi-darkness, this transition was much harder on me than her, and much, much harder than I expected. I laid her down in the crib and she went right to sleep without even crying but a minute. I, on the other hand, walked into our room, saw the empty pack-n-play, and burst into tears.

I know part of it is that I am a creature of habit and don't like change, and some of it is being afraid I won't hear her if she needs me (how did people survive before monitors?). Most of it though, and I know this is going to sound ridiculous since she is only four months old, is that I feel sad that she is growing up so fast. On top of my returning to work, this move to her "bigger girl bed" is sort of another step towards her independence, and, while I want her to be a strong independent young lady, I'm not ready for it yet. Perhaps I'll never be quite ready. Perhaps this is what lots of mom's tears are about. I get the feeling that these are the first of many tears over her "growing up". I get it, Mom.