Don't be Judgy (and Lily's 9 Month Check Up)

Today was Lily's nine month check up. She is doing great. Still tall (29 inches - 99th percentile) but thinning out a bit (18lbs 5oz - 50th percentile) due to all the moving around. She is the picture of perfect health and even tolerated her shot and anemia test fairly well.

I had an interesting realization at the doctor's today, though.

It was really crowded this morning. The office was full of kids waiting for their check up (our pediatrician, who I love, intentionally schedules the well visits in the morning and sick visits in the afternoon to limit contagion). A mother with her daughter, who was probably about four, were in front of me in line to check in. I heard her explain to the receptionist that she didn't have an appointment, but she really needs to see a doctor right away because her daughter has a mosquito bite that is swelling on her face.

I have to admit. My first thoughts were judgy. Really...a mosquito bite? You rush your daughter to the doctor for a mosquito bite? I have ten mosquito bites right now! I can't even see it from here! It can't be worth the time and expense of a doctor visit! How silly! I could tell the people in line behind me and in the waiting room were thinking the same thing. I could tell that the receptionist was thinking the same thing, although she handled it quite well and told the woman they would work her in (this is part of why I love this doctor).

Selfishly, I thought about my busy day. I thought about all I had to do and how I had my appointment scheduled three months ago. I thought about how I would be upset if they "worked her in" before I got to see the doctor. I thought about how "unfair" it would be if her mosquito bite somehow meant we had to spend more time waiting.

As I sat there waiting (just a few minutes) for my appointment, though, I got to thinking. Am I really that different from this mom? Am I not a worry wart sometimes (see cartoon!)? Don't I sometimes start to freak out over a little bump, or a "strange" diaper, or a "gooky" eye? The difference for me is Josh. He tells me chill out. He keeps me from freaking out. What if this woman doesn't have a husband? What is if she doesn't have a mom, or sister, or friend to ask? What if her daughter has a special medical condition where a bug bite could be a big deal?

Bottom line...I don't know her story. I don't know her situation. I should not be judgy. I should just count my own blessings!

9 Months - "Never Grow Up"

Today Lily is nine months old! I know I say this all the time, but it really does seem like time is flying by. It's probably hormonal, but I am feeling super sappy and sentimental today. Yesterday, Josh made me (and yes, it was by force) listen to the Taylor Swift song "Never Grow Up". It is like torture for me at the moment. It is impossible for me to listen to without sobbing. This is the first verse and chorus:


Your little hands wrapped around my finger
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So I tuck you in and turn on your favorite nightlight

To you, everything's funny
You got nothing to regret
I'd give all I have honey
If you could stay like that

Oh darling don't you ever grow up,
don't you ever grow up
Just stay this little
Oh darling don't you ever grow up,
don't you ever grow up
It could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you
Wont let no one break your heart
No one will desert you
Just try to never grow up
Never grow up

Seriously...just posting that, I'm sitting here with tears streaming. I can't even conceive of the next two verses (they deal with being a rebellious teenager and moving out on your own). It is mind boggling to me how a young girl like Swift, who is not a mother, can so capture what I feel for my daughter. If you haven't heard the song, you should. It's beautiful...just be prepared to cry!

Hatley on Zulily!

Need some good jammies for your little one? Check out the Hatley sale on Zulily!

A few months ago, I posted about "Lily's" favorite Hatley pajamas. Someone gave us the adorable flamingo coverall. It is super cute, fits for a long time (she still wears the 3-6month one...barely!), and is made with ultra-soft cotton and chemical-free dyes. I love it and have wanted for a while to buy her some more, but they are really expensive. Normally they are $33. I just can't justify spending that on a pair of baby pj's.

BUT...today, Hatley showed up on Zulily! Remember Zulily, it's that bargain site I posted about a week ago. Hatley pajamas are on Zulily for only $13! This is bad....this is really bad...I currently have four pairs in my "shopping basket" (the four pictured). Granted, my total is less that what two pair would cost normally and they are in various sizes for her to grow into, and one is a gift (not for anyone specific, just to have as a gift for someone someday) but still, do I (or I should say, does Lily) really need four pair of pajamas?

What to buy...what to buy?!?! :)

Sneaking in the Greens!

Lily is starting to be a bit of a picky eater. She has, for example, figured out that peaches are more delicious than spinach. At first, she would eat anything I fed her. I'm not sure if that was because I was feeding her from jars and all of that food is more bland (she still eats anything from a jar), or if she was just not yet discriminating in her tastes.

Now that I'm making her food, she has shown a distinct preference for the sweet! She will gobble down the fruit, and tolerates carrots and sweet potatoes. The greens, however, she will not eat alone. I've tried zucchini, broccoli, peas, and spinach. She gags with them all. If, however, I make a blend, say blueberries and broccoli (I know...weird), she will eat it.

I'm not sure if this is a good move or not. Part of me wants her to enjoy the vegetables on their own, for their savory flavors. I've tried mixing them with cereal or yogurt and adding some savory spices (cinnamon, cumin, or paprika), but she still won't eat but a few bites. The foodie in me knows that salt will make them taste better, but they (whoever they are) say not to give salt to babies.

Then there is the part of me that just wants her to get the good nutrients and doesn't care if she has them mixed with sweets or not. This morning she gobbled down her favorite breakfast of applesauce with yogurt and cinnamon without even noticing the spoon full of spinach I added!

Any of you baby food making mom's out there have any thoughts?

Happy Father's Day!

I want to wish a very Happy Father's Day to two of the best fathers I know.

My Dad - When I was growing up, my dad was the dad that was always around, and it was cool. He chaperoned field trips, came to school to help with projects, and was even my band booster president (yes, I was in the band, and color guard, and it was cool at my school!). My dad is the type of man who would do anything to help anyone. He's a volunteer fire fighter, teaches boating safety classes, and was instrumental in getting water quality testing started on our lake. Some of my most fond memories of my child hood are the nights when my mom had things to do and dad was in charge. We would get fried chicken and go on a wayside picnic, make grilled Hersey bar sandwiches, or (and these are some of the very best memories) go out on the lake and go swimming! My dad is the kind of guy that doesn't say a lot, but when he does it's usually funny and full of love. I know that I am very blessed to have him for a dad and Lily is very blessed to have "Deano" for a granddad.

Josh - My husband, along with being a great husband, is an amazing father. Through all of our fertility struggles he was very supportive and encouraging. When I would want to start saying "if" he would say "when". When we found out we were expecting Lily, his joy rivaled mine and helped me overcome some of my fear. He fully supported my desire for a natural labor, even though I think he thought I was crazy, and was an amazing birth partner. His level head when something is amiss with Lily is a very good balance to my tendency to over analyze and worry. And he loves his daughter...man does he love his daughter. There are few things in the world that give me as much joy as watching them together. The light in both of their eyes when they are smiling at each other, or her laugh when he makes faces at her, is the best thing on Earth. I have no idea how single parents do it. I need his partnership, love, support, and sanity. I know Lily and I are so blessed to have him.

**Sadly, Lily and I are out of town for her first father's day. We made plans with a friend far in advance, not realizing it was Father's day weekend, and Josh is too busy with work to join us. I feel fairly terrible about taking her away, but promise to use FaceTime so Lily can see and hear her daddy! The flip side is that our plans have taken us to Pulaski, so we do get the spend the day with Lily's two granddads.

Shopping - Online vs. In Store

When buying things, especially things for Lily, I always struggle with whether I should order online or go to the store. Josh loves ordering things online and would never go to stores if he could get away with it. I am also a bit of an Amazon junkie. It's nice to be able to read reviews and they usually have the best prices. I also love having things arrive at my door. Still, I frequently need to go see things in person before I can commit to buying them. I want to feel the fabric and see the exact colors. I also struggle a bit with the packaging waste that comes with online purchases. It's a tough choice. What do you prefer? Please vote in the poll on the right!

Deliveries!

Today was a big day at our house with two deliveries. We got packages from UPS and Fed-Ex!

The first delivery was Lily's big girl car seat. We decided to go with the Evenflo Triumph 65. It was the Consumer Report top pick, and I have a friend who uses it and really likes it. My two favorite features (aside from how safe it is) are the machine washable cover and the easy twist to tighten straps. It will also convert from rear to front facing and she can use it until she is 65 pounds! So far, in our living room, she seems to like it!

The other delivery was two new toys for Lily! We have recently realized that Lily is starting to get bored with her toys. My nanny suggested we get her some sort of shape sorter and maybe something that made music or taught numbers. After some searching, we decided we really loved the classic Tupperware sorter, so we ordered one of those.

At one point I'm pretty sure I said I really didn't want my baby to have toys that make sounds and have flashing lights. I'm not sure if I thought it was too much stimulation, just didn't want to have to hear it, or didn't like the waste...must not matter now. Well, it turns out that babies actually really like sounds and lights. So, we found a really cute baby piano that teaches numbers and makes sound. I must admit part of why I like it is that you can turn the volume low!

Schools out for Summer!

It hit me this morning. I woke up and realized I didn't have to go to work! (Well, I did have to go in for a few minutes and sign in, but that hardly counts!). Words can not express how excited I am about this first summer with Lily. We are going to have so much fun.

At one point I got a bit freaked out when I looked at my plans for the summer. Between travel and summer school, my calendar was already full! This first week off is quite busy as my friend Star is coming to town and we are going to VA for my nephew's second birthday. We also have some plans to go to visit our family over the July 4th weekend and an Ocracoke trip the first of August. It's all very fun stuff, but I was feeling my summer slipping by too quickly before it even started!

Thus, I went back and forth about whether or not I wanted to teach summer school. I've taught the past three years, and actually really enjoy it. It's good money, good hours (8-12), and a good opportunity for me to get to know my upcoming struggling students. At first I had signed up to do the whole month of July, but started to feel remorseful and proposed my teaching partner teach half. I wasn't sure if the school would let us, but everyone agreed! Thus, I only teach the last two week of July. That gives me a full five weeks free (give or take some vacation)!

I can't wait to to take Lily to the pool, to the museum, and to hang out with all of her little friends! Not to mention having time myself to do things around the house and hang out with my friends! It is going to be quite lovely.

So Much is Changing!

Attack of the Crawling Lily from splattergrits on Vimeo.

I think I say things like this a lot, but babies sure do grow up fast! I really can not believe how much Lily is growing and changing. This has been a big weekend for change.

Josh and I spent a big part of the day yesterday researching and shopping for a "big girl" car seat because she is quickly outgrowing the other one. We've also been buying her some new "advanced" toys, as she is finding the old ones boring. In the last few days she has started going from her belly to sitting up all by herself, scoots everywhere she wants to go on her tummy (see video!), and is eating finger foods!

This morning, I went in to get her up and found her standing in her crib smiling at me and bouncing! For the first time this morning she also clapped her hands and said the equivalent of "yay". We sat her in the floor and she scooted over and pulled herself up on the couch to look at us.

It is crazy, she is doing so many new things every minute! She has started using a bit of baby sign language, is quite mobile, and even seems to understand "dada" and "mama". It is incredibly fun to see her learn so much. I have a feeling the next few years of watching her little brain soak everything up are going to be a blast!

P.S. Thanks Auntie Star for the babylegs, they are protecting her knees from floor burn!

Making Baby Food

When I started this parenting thing, I swore that I would make all my own baby food. That hasn't happened. After two early failed attempts (mixing sweet potatoes with spoiled breast milk, and making a banana puree that quickly turned brown and which Lily wouldn't eat), I stuck with the jars for a while.

It wasn't really the failure thank kept me from making my own. It was more the ease of pre-made baby food. Everyone says that making your own food isn't hard. They say "just puree up whatever you are making for the family". Well, during the day I work, and I needed something easy to leave for the nanny to feed her. I didn't want her to have to worry with preparing meals for Lily. In the evenings, I hate to admit it, but what "the family" eats isn't really that baby friendly. We tend to eat out a lot or get take out. Not exactly what I want Lily to be eating.

I think the Super Baby Food book was also a problem for me. I got so frustrated with that book and all the contradictory recommendations, that I think I was somewhat afraid of making my own food. It is much easier to just grab a jar from the pantry to feed her, especially if we were going out. Plus, I buy the organic Earth's Best baby food, so I know it doesn't have anything strange in it.

This summer, however, I really want to do better. I have time, which I think has been my main deterrent. I have also fed Lily many new things and discovered that they haven't hurt her in any way, so my fears of that are no longer a factor. I've also found a great website, wholesomebabyfood.com, that has lots of good information and recipes. Unlike Super Baby Food, it is well organized and realistic, not alarmist!

So, this morning I started the day pureeing frozen peas and mango for today's meals. After church, I was off to the farmers market to stock up on wholesome, fresh, local fruits and veggies. Tomorrow my baby food making blitz begins! My plan is to make a bunch of food cubes to freeze. Wish me luck!

A Scary Night

Anyone out there had a baby with croup? That is some scary s#*t! Pardon my language, but it is!

Last night I put my seemingly normally healthy baby to bed. At 1am I awoke to her crying and gasping in the monitor. Her breathing was really ragged and she had a cough that sounded like a barking seal. I woke Josh and we called the 24 hour nurse advice hot line.

After listening to her breath over the phone and determining that she was struggling to breath both in and out, she advised us to take her to the Emergency Room. At around 2am we were on our way.

The ER was surprisingly efficient. Apparently that is the norm when a baby is having trouble breathing. We signed in and in a few minutes they took us back to a room (well, a curtained off section of a room) where the respiratory specialist came to give her an epinephrine breathing treatment to help open her airway. Then they gave her a long acting oral steroid to help keep it open.

Then the waiting began. Because she had that epinephrine, we had to wait a minimum of three hours for them to monitor her breathing. By 4am, she was already doing much better. She fell asleep in my arms, despite the interesting conversation going on in the curtain next to ours, and slept for a quite a while.

At around 5am, a nurse came in and said he had to take her temperature, rectally. Seriously...this poor baby is finally calmly resting and you want to take her temperature. Yes. So that woke her up and made her a bit upset, but I calmed her down and fed her. She then proceeded to play, happily sitting with me on the bed for a while. She was quite cute and the nurses were taken with her. One brought her a "hospitality" bag with a cute blue and white stuffed dog and a rattle. We waited (and listened to the guy next door).

As the magic 6:15 drew near we weren't sure if anyone would come, but the awesome Pediatric resident (who just happened to finish at William and Mary the same year we did) showed up with our paperwork just a little after. We headed out and I was surprised to see the sun up as we got in the car. This wasn't exactly what I had in mind for my Tuesday night, but at least Lily seems to be doing fine now. She (and we) have been sleepy all day, but her breathing is much improved.

Have you heard of zulily?

Have you heard of zulily?

Can you say, awesome?! It's my newest obsession. They offer daily deals for moms, babies, and kids! Most of their offers are from small businesses, and they even have a bunch of great organic and handmade stuff! Like Groupon, you sign up your email (free membership) and they send you deals each morning. Some expire that day others are good for several days. This may be a dangerous website for me!

If you have kids, or kids you shop for, you really should check it out. CLICK HERE to sign up!

P.S. It doesn't hurt that Lily is in their name! :)

Car Seat Survey

Hey all you moms and dads out there. Lily is quickly outgrowing her carrier car seat. She is way too heavy to carry around in it, rarely falls asleep in the car anymore, and is just getting too big! It's time for us to look into a new seat for her. I'd like a convertible one so that she can still be rear facing for at least a year. We are going to have to have at least two, so I'd prefer them not be ridiculously expensive. Do you have any recommendations? What are your thoughts on new versus used? Anyone have one they are ready to move out of?

Time to Babyproof!

Well, it happened. We failed as parents. At least in part. Two nights ago, while we were cleaning the kitchen and cooking dinner, Lily was in her walker tooling around the family room. She found her way to the lamp by the couch, and, before Josh could get to her to stop her, she pulled it over. It shattered on the floor leaving her standing in a pile of broken glass. Yikes! Luckily there were no injuries, but it certainly was an eye opener.

It seems that our little girl is growing up. She is becoming strong and mobile quickly. A few weeks ago, she couldn't get around at all. Now, by rolling or scooting, she can get wherever she wants to go. She seems to know what she wants (usually things she shouldn't have: electrical cords, DVD's, fish food, etc) and goes after it! It's time for us to get started baby proofing.

At first Josh said he thought we didn't need locks and such, but could just teach what to do and not to do. I think there is a bit of truth in that. My nanny and I had a conversation today about telling her no and replacing the off limits item with something good for her to play with. Still, I think there are some things we need to do!

Last night we bought a new TV stand that has doors that keep all of our electronics away from her little hands. Our old one was pretty unsafe because it had a glass top that didn't attach which she could easily pull off when she starts pulling up, which she is already starting to do. We've put plug covers in all of the outlets she can reach. Tomorrow my nanny is bringing some cabinet locks and things that she has left over, but we'll still need a few more and gates for the stairs.

Anyone have any baby proofing advice? Does anyone have a cabinet lock or gate style that they like?

Teen Moms

The High School where my church meets has quite a few students who either have children or are expecting children. As part of our ongoing efforts to really be part of the school community, we have recently started looking for ways to support these girls. As soon as this was mentioned in church one Sunday, I teared up and knew that I was supposed to help. Today I decided to take the day off work to attend our first event, a "baby shower".

We took tons of diapers and gently used clothes, along with lunch for the girls. I wasn't sure what to expect. While these women are moms, they are also still high school students. The counselor had to go and "remind" many of them to attend, but once they did, what happened was beautiful. I think that being together in one space helped them see that they are not alone. Although shy at first, they soon dived into searching for clothes for their little ones and conversation with each other about motherhood.

It was obvious who was expecting and who was already a mother, and not just because of the belly. There was a noticeable maturity among those who already have a baby they are taking care of. I'm not surprised. Being a mom brings with it a whole new set of concerns and joy and until you experience it, you really have no idea what you are in for.

I was somewhat surprised to see one of the fathers come with his girlfriend to the shower. I'm proud of that young man even though I don't know him. It can't be easy for a teenage boy to come into a room full of girls looking at baby clothes, heck, I don't think Josh would have done it. It really got me thinking that all of these baby's have dads. Perhaps we need to look more into ways that we can support them as well. Being a dad isn't easy either and there is lots of evidence out there about how important having a good dad is.

I hope that seeing us there, struggling with our own babies fussing, being hungry, spilling things, etc. they see that no one has it all together. The point is that we all realize that parenthood is a challenge, but that having people, be they your peers or elders (wow...I hate that word, I am not old enough to be an elder, but I couldn't think of another word that would work), to talk about all of the struggles and joys with makes the whole journey a bit easier and a lot more fun. I know I'm blessed to have lots of other moms in my life.

Overall, I can not imagine being a high school student and a mother. Motherhood is a tough gig even when you are "grown up". I'm impressed that these girls are finishing school and doing their best to be good moms. I want to do anything I can to support that. We have plans to do more "showers" in the future as well as large group outings and a mentor program. I'm so excited to see what God does in the lives of these young girls and their little ones.