Cookie Monster

So, I'm not sure if the title of this post refers to Lily, or to me. I had a bit of a melt down on Christmas day at Josh's parents house...because of cookies.

Lily, who is usually a really good eater, got to a point where she wouldn't eat her breakfast or lunch because she wanted cookies. It started at my house where my dad gave her some sweets the day before and she started walking over to where the cookies were, pointing at the tins, and pointing at her mouth. It was really cute and she was super happy to get cookies, so we were all giving her a bite. On Christmas morning she had several bites at my house before we left to head to the Halls.

Once there, she had a few more bites of cookies from his family, then totally refused things she usually loves for breakfast. After breakfast I said she couldn't have any more cookies until she ate some food, and was "jokingly" called "no fun" and "bad". This made me a bit upset, but I tried to laugh it off. The family kept giving Lily bites of cookies. Then there was lunch, which Lily also totally refused, and I once again laid down the no more cookie law.

Then, I "caught" Josh's uncle trying to sneak her more cookies when I wasn't looking, and I lost it. I stormed upstairs where I proceeded to cry for about an hour and refused to come down until that uncle left. I was upset that they didn't listen to me and worried that Lily would have a sugar crash that night when we were supposed to go to Josh's grandma's. I know it was a ridiculous response. I know that one day of eating only cookies isn't really that big of a deal. Once I had the outburst, though, I felt embarrassed about having it. I blame the hormones.

Christmas - The Story of Stuff

I learned something new this Christmas. People LOVE buying for little ones, myself included. It is nearly impossible to resist all of those adorable outfits and toys that are so affordable! This Christmas Lily received no fewer than fifteen outfits and equally as many toys including several big items (a small table, a slide, a rocking horse, and a giant inflatable air swimming shark (which was actually given to Josh!) If she continues to receive gifts at the rate she did the Christmas and if we also add Jack's gifts, we are going to need another house just to store all of their toys!

It was only by the grace of God and Josh's amazing tetris skills that we were able to get everything in the car to come home. Luckily Josh's parents had delivered the little table ahead of time, and my parents are planning a trip down in the next few weeks to deliver some other big hand me down presents (a swing, a barbie jeep, and a crib for Jack). I'm still not sure where we are going to put everything, but luckily we have a decent size attic and garage to store things she has outgrown or hasn't grown into yet, and we did end up returning a few clothes in order to buy things in the next size up. No baby needs two weeks worth of pajamas in the same size!

I'm torn about the whole consumer Christmas thing. Part of me is strongly opposed. I mean, who really needs all of this stuff, and it in the end it ends up in the landfill as things break and kids outgrow them. On the other hand, I love to shop for the little ones. Josh has said several times that we really shouldn't buy presents for Lily since everyone else does, but I'm not sure I can do that. I love picking out things that I know she will enjoy! I know I am guilty of buying more than is probably necessary for my nephew and some of the other kids in my life. Shopping for them is just so much fun!

I think most of us need to find ways to scratch that shopping itch in a more moderate way. Perhaps we'll start a college fund for Lily and ask people to contribute to that instead. Perhaps I'll do more of my shopping at consignment and thrift stores next year. I also know there are lots of needy kids out there that may not get anything for Christmas, and I would love to shop for them. Convincing my family, including my husband, however, to give up buying so much for us so we can put those funds towards others, is not as easy as you might think, and I don't want to come across as high and mighty, guilt them into it, or have everyone end up spending twice as much to buy for those in need AND ourselves. Anyone have any good tips on making that transition?

Seeing Santa

It seemed like a rite of passage. It seemed like something we HAD to do. It was a bad idea. It made me feel like the worst mother ever. Yep, we took Lily to see Santa! The realtor who helped us buy and sell our house is Santa during the holiday season and has free visits and photos for his friends and clients. We didn't go last year because Lily was really tiny and it was cold and snowy the night of the event. This year I insisted, against Josh's now obviously wise resistance, that we had to take her. We both hurried out of work so we could get her changed into her Christmas outfit and get there in time. When we go to the church where the event was held, Lily was happy and playing with some other waiting children, but as soon as we entered the room where Santa was she suddenly became terrified. She refused to even go near him without screaming! We ended up holding her with our backs to Santa while he peeked in and we got a few pictures. I wish I had know that was the back up plan because I would have fixed my hair and made Josh take off his hoodie. Oh well...maybe next year...or maybe we'll wait a few years before trying again!

What's in a Name?

As I leaked in the previous post. Baby Boy Hall has a name! Jackson David, aka. Jack. Jackson because it is my maiden name, and David, which is Josh's middle name.

With Lily we kept her name top secret, but with Jack, we knew pretty early what we wanted to call him and have been calling him that as a family for a while now. Lily even knows who (and usually where) "Jack" is. She even says "Jack" as she kisses my belly, which is just adorable!

14 Months!

Today Lily is fourteen months! I know I haven't had time to post which is sad, because it is amazing how "grown up" she is becoming. She walks almost all the time now. She doesn't say a lot of recognizable words, but babbles a lot. She definitely understands what we are saying to her most of the time! It is so awesome to watch her respond to simple things like "What does a sheep say?", or "brush your hair." She is getting teeth, slowly, but surly and has three and a half now!

She is a very independent little miss, which is sometimes a bit frustrating, but overall she is incredibly well behaved. Josh and I were marveling just yesterday about how readily she responds when we say "no" and how she is learning quickly what the "rules" are around the house. Her biggest "misbehaviors" so far have all had to do with throwing her food and drink in the floor when she was finished eating, but just this week she has started saying "all done" and doing the sign or putting her cup in the cup holder on her tray and then clapping her hands and being proud she did the right thing.

This past weekend, while we were out of town for Thanksgiving, she was totally cute and sweet most of the time despite all the strangers and transitions. She is always a little shy when we are at a new place with new people, and didn't really want anyone but mom and dad to hold her (she doesn't really want anyone to pick her up...she can walk herself gosh darn it!), but she pretty quickly warmed up enough to play contentedly by herself. She ate all sorts of new foods happily and slept well in various places at various times. I know we are totally blessed! I only pray that little "Jack" is as well behaved!

*This is a picture of Lily entertaining herself at the car dealership waiting on an oil change! :)

Lily Walks!

Lily has recently been super close to walking. She was so mobile and good at pulling up and cruising that at first we were sure she would walk by her first birthday, but that milestone came and went without her taking more than a couple of unassisted steps. In the last few weeks since her birthday she has shown that she can go from sitting to standing and walk several steps on her own, but she didn't do it regularly. The first time she seemed really determined was about a week ago when she really wanted to help me sweep (we have a video that I'll post soon)! Still, most of the time she would look down and realize she could crawl faster, and use that mode of transportation.

Then, last Sunday, we went over to a friends house where another friend was with her 11 month old. That little girl was walking all over the place. I could tell Lily was watching her. Then, after they left the party, Lily kept trying to walk around. I think she was inspired. She has been walking a lot more this week and even walked about half way down our hallway. My guess is she'll be running by Christmas!

Support?

Apparently when you are expecting baby number two, especially when it's just barely a year since number one, your body goes through more physical stress. I have really been struggling lately with lower back and right hip and leg pain that are probably sciatica. It hurts some after just a normal day. If I do anything remotely physical, it hurts a lot. It's even hard to find comfortable positions to sleep in.

At my last midwife appointment she suggested I get a pregnancy support belt of some kind. I have to be honest, since I totally didn't need one with Lily, I feel sort of like they are silly. Still, having some relief would not be a bad thing. They make everything from really small and cheap ones to elaborate and expensive ones. Does anyone have any experience with one? What kind? I welcome any and all feedback!

My Pants Don't Fit! Know of Any Good Consignment Stores?

I am at a weird place wardrobe wise. Since becoming pregnant with number two I've alternated between my maternity clothes and some of my "regular" clothes that still fit. Ok, to be honest, that has been the case since Lily was born. I've continued to wear the maternity things that were cute and fit and added in things that were not maternity and fit. But, in reality, I don't have much that isn't maternity that will fit, and what does doesn't look as good as maternity clothes do. There is just something about they way they are cut that is much more flattering to the belly!

Today I attempted to wear a pair of my normal khaki pants and a shirt I had before I was pregnant to work, but it didn't turn out too well. The pants seemed ok this morning as long as I kept them tucked under my belly, but in reality were not at all comfortable when I sat down, so I ended up using the rubber band trick to expand the waist, which then led to me feeling like my pants were unbuttoned and coming off all day! As soon as I got home, I switched into my comfy maternity jeans.

My current problem is that all of my maternity things, or at least the majority of them, were for hot weather. Lily was born at the end of September. I wore sundresses right up until her birth. I have skirts, shorts, capris, tanktops, and t-shirts in maternity sizes. I do not have pants or long sleeve tops to wear to work now that it is starting to get cold! I do have some jeans, but I can't (or feel like I shouldn't) wear them for everyday at work.

I did have one friend give me some winter things, and many of the tops are great, but the pants are all a little too short, and I can't bring myself to wear high waters just because I'm pregnant. I think I'm going to have to face facts and go shopping, but I really don't love spending a ton of money on clothes that I won't wear for too long.

I looked at some things on Craigslist today. Has anyone bought clothes on Craigslist before? Something about going to someone's house to look at their clothes is a bit strange to me, but I like the idea of "gently used". Also, does anyone know of any good consignment stores in the area that carry maternity stuff? Or any recently pregnant moms who would be getting rid of size medium winter clothes?

Happy Halloween!

Last night we took Lily to a Halloween Party at the Keane's. She was so cute! We went with a family Angry Birds costume theme. We got the idea when my work decided to do Angry Birds, then we found a red bird shirt for Josh and decided Lily would make the perfect little blue bird.

I made Lily and my costume by piecing together felt (thanks to help from Lisa Meyer) faces. I wanted to make Lily a pig, but Josh said they are the "bad guys", and wouldn't let me! Amazingly, she even kept her little top "feathers" on most of the night. She had fun at the party, but was a little unsure of some of the masks.

Tomorrow, for Halloween, I think we are going to have a quiet night at home handing out candy to any little goblins that show up. Next year, the trick-or-treating will begin!

Boy Clothes!

Today I got my first baby boy clothes! I'm super excited! I've resisted shopping myself, but now our little man won't have to wear pink! :) Thanks Elizabeth and Madison!

It's a Boy!

Yesterday Josh and I had our 20 week ultrasound of baby Hall #2. Everything looked healthy and great, and the very first shot the technician got was a very obvious junk shot of our little man! There is no question that he is a boy. Josh and I knew it even before she told us.

I have to admit that I am surprised. I really believed it was a girl. I'm not sure why. I had completely convinced myself that we were having a girl and when it was obvious that wasn't true, I was in a bit of shock. Josh said I acted strange, and I'm not surprised. I really felt sort of off balance for a little while, almost like I didn't know how to change the picture I'd created in my head of our future family. I wasn't exactly sad, how could I be with a healthy little man, just really surprised.

Last night Josh and I went out to dinner and had some time to really talk about it, and I started to create a new picture of our family. We started to talk about names (no final decision yet on that front, but lots of ideas) and bedrooms, and other baby boy things, and I started to get excited about meeting him. Josh is super excited and said he has always pictured his family with a boy and a girl an older sister and younger brother. He said he really hoped for a boy, but didn't want to say so in case it was a girl. He pointed out to me how this way each of them will be unique and special rather than being "the girls" the way it could be with two the same sex so close in age. I agree and think this new little man will be a wonderful and exciting new adventure for our family.

Lily's Party

This past weekend was Lily's first birthday party. It was a festive event with our family and close friends. We grilled hot dogs and had a variety of toppings, her grandma's helped out by bringing baked beans and chili, my friend Lisa made an amazing cake, and the Wagners and Keans helped with the alcohol (for the adults, although I'm pretty sure Lily got at least one taste of wine from "someone's" finger). There were absolutely no tears, and I believe she enjoyed the party much more than most one year olds!

It was so adorable to watch her actually open her gifts and play with them. We had to take a few away so we could get her to move on to the next ones, but she was seriously interested in taking things out of the bags and boxes! She also dove into her cake in true video worthy fashion. At first she didn't like having the icing on her fingers, but once she got the first bite, she was hooked! We had to eventually take it away, but not until we good some great pictures and video! We ended the night with a bonfire in our back yard and roasting marshmallows. It was truly a great night for all!

Ready for Her Close Up!

This past weekend, my dear friend Star was here to visit with us and take some one year photos of Lily. This less than stellar shot is with my phone, but I absolutely can not wait to get her photos! She always does such a good job and, not to brag, but my little girl is pretty photogenic!

I really wanted Lily to have something special for her pictures, but I waited too long to order something online and everything I found was really expensive. So, I decided to "make" her something to wear. Ok....I'm not very crafty. I do some jewelry, but I'm certainly not a seamstress. I'm blessed with very talented friends, but, for some reason, it was important for me to take on this project myself.

At my friend Sabrina's wedding a few weeks ago, she made shirts for her sons that looked like they had ties on them by cutting out fabric and using double sided iron on stuff (apparently called heat 'n' bond). She had gotten the idea from another friend, Cristin, who used the same method to make a onsie for her sister. She had written this blog post about her project. I read the post and figured this was one project I could handle!

The hardest part of the whole project was finding the materials. I had a tough time finding a solid color shirt and fabric I liked. In the end I found this shirt and pants on the Target sale rack. I purchased two pair of pants so I could cut up one to make the "1" coordinate. I ended up having to borrow some left over heat 'n' bond from Sabrina, since I couldn't find it at Michaels or Walmart (and didn't have time to make it to JoAnn...I know...I shouldn't procrastinate).

It was actually very simple. I followed Cristin's directions and the ones on the package and the whole thing was done in around an hour (plus the time it took to wash everything). The stitching is far from perfect, but I have to say I'm very pleased with the results! Next year I'll have to make one with at "2", but I prefer not to think about that yet.

One Year Old!

I can not believe that my little darling is a year old. Time really does fly by. I have to admit that we aren't doing anything special for her actual birthday. Don't get me wrong, we are having a party (a small one for family and closest friends), and I'm sure she'll have presents, and my friend Star is coming this weekend to do pictures, but today, on her birthday, I have no plans.

Things have just been crazy busy, and Josh has been out of town, and this week, ok...to be honest, all weeks...at work has been stressful. My only solace is that she has no idea what is going on!

Miss Independent

My daughter is very independent. Sometimes this makes me proud. Sometimes it makes me sad. Seriously, I am glad that she can entertain herself. I'm glad that she isn't clingy to Josh and I and doesn't get upset with a sitter or in the church nursery. I'm glad we can have adult meals and she can sit in her high chair and feed herself. I'm glad she can give herself her bottle and fall asleep on her own. I know these are all good things and skills that will help her be a well adjusted grown up.

I also know that some of this is a phase and that she is just so busy exploring and enjoying the world, now that she can, that she doesn't have time for cuddling. Part of me realizes I'm going to really appreciate her independence in a few months when #2 arrives and I'm going to be busy meeting all of her (I'm going with her for now...we find out October 11th) needs.

Still, sometimes it's hard on a mom. It wasn't that long ago that she needed me for everything. I think that not nursing her any more is what really has been tough on me. That was sort of our quiet, special, close time. She doesn't really need me to play with her. She does like to have you near by when she is playing, but doesn't really want you to read her books to her or play with the toys for her. She doesn't need you to go up and down the stairs...she can do it! Now, she doesn't even let me hold the bottle or lay back and snuggle when taking it (unless she is really sleepy). She wants to sit up where she can see what is going on. I miss those sweet cuddly days!

I blame all of this on her father! Josh's parents say he was exactly the same way from an early age. I guess I haven't asked my mom about me. We both are fairly independent adults. Hmmm...I guess it remains to be seen, but I sort of hope #2 is a cuddler!

The Fall

Well, it happened. Lily had a fairly serious fall....a fall that necessitated the boo boo bunny...a fall that made me feel like a totally crappy mom.

I was changing her tonight on her changing table. She was standing up and leaning against me as I unsnapped her onsie, when she lunged to the side and toppled off the table. I grabbed for her on the way down and sort of slowed the fall, but only managed to grab her diaper, which tore. She landed sort of on her side mostly on the carpet, but her cheek hit the wooden rocking horse that sits in her room.

As she was tumbling (which seemed to happen very slowly) I yelled for Josh, who came rushing up the stairs. I honestly think my reaction scared her more than she was actually hurt. She was crying fairly hard, though, which made me pretty worried. After a preliminary examination, though, it appeared that she only had a bruise on her cheek, but I sent Josh after the boo boo bunny.

By the time he got back upstairs, she was mostly calm. She would NOT let us hold that cute bunny covered ice cube on her (does that thing work as they get older?). Instead, she wanted to lick it! I debated whether it was worth making her mad to try to ice the bruising spot, but since it didn't appear to be swelling, I decided against it. Josh and I both checked her over pretty good and I think the worst of it is going to be a bruise the size of a quarter on her cheek.

At this point, after all the drama was over, and we were all sitting in the floor playing, I began to cry. I just felt so bad about letting her fall. I should have made her sit or lie down while I was undressing her. I should have had a better hold on her. I think I've gotten a bit complacent and give her more credit for balance and stability than she deserves. You can bet I'll be more careful from now on!

Pumpkin Spice Lattes Make Me Cry

Yesterday I had my first pumpkin spice latte from Starbucks in over year and cried all the way to work! You may think that is a little extreme and I'm sure it's a little hormonal, but the last time I had a pumpkin spice latte I was in the hospital having Lily. That week, in fact, in the hospital, I had two. The first was the morning of my induction. We had gone into the hospital the night before and woke hungry but not wanting any of the hospital food. I sent Josh to the hospital Starbucks and he came back with a bagel and my first every pumpkin spice latte (decaf of course!). It was delicious.

The second was the morning we left the hospital to bring Lily home. We had a very rough night in the NICU sleep room having a sleepless baby all to ourselves for the first time and paranoid that something would go wrong now that she was disconnected from all of her monitors. Josh again ran to the Starbucks and returned with a bagel and pumpkin spice latte (I was hooked). They accidentally made two caf, so he had to get a third in decaf (for me for free), and we shared the extra caf one with one of our amazing doctors.

Those first days of Lily's life are packed with an amazing myriad of emotions. The fear and disappointment of learning I was going to have to be induced. The drama and pain of labor and delivery. The joy and excitement at her arrival. The anxiety when she was taken to the NICU. The frustration over not having her with us and not being able to nurse her right away. The beauty of those first few moments when we did get to hold her and I got to nurse her. The shock of that first night in the sleep room where we realized we were totally responsible. The relief and excitement as we left the hospital to bring her home to our house as a family. It was by far, the most emotionally charged few day of my life, and it's funny how the tastes and smells of the one hot beverage can bring all of that pouring back.

As we start to think about the arrival of baby number two, I have to admit that I'm a little nervous. I'm just not sure I'm ready to go through all of that again. I pray, and I ask that you pray, that this arrival will be a bit less dramatic than the first!

Back to School...wow!

Let me start by saying that I'm tired. I think I've been tired for pretty much two straight weeks. So far the start of school, trying to start a new service project (more on that later), taking care of Lily, and growing this new little one are sort of kicking my butt. Honestly, it's mostly school. I feel like every year we teachers are being asked to do more and more with less and less. I have a team of a hundred and twenty students who each need special attention to be successful. Add to that the fact that I am team leader (which isn't a huge deal, but some added responsibility), now have lunch duty twice a week (which we didn't have before) and have another class in my room during one of my planning times, and I am really struggling to get everything done.

Hence the lack of blogging.

I do have things I want to say, including...
...Triangle Community Birth Stories - my new outreach project to expecting mom
...Serving others makes me happy (TCBS, Athens Moms, RRM, and Youth Group)
...Lily is growing and changing fast (I know...I say this a lot, but there are new things to tell!)
...Baby #2 - I have lots of comments and questions about that one!
...Keeping a clean house, and why today's women need help
...Planning a 1st Birthday Party
...I Need Community, and so do you
...Thank God for Helpful Friends!

I pray that someday soon, the dust will settle and I'll have time to write again...until then, don't worry about me, but do check on me!

Make Way for DucklingS

Did anyone notice that I changed the blog title a while back. Did anyone notice the "S"? Yep...it's true, we are expecting another little Duckling! We found out on June 30th. I had been a few days late, and told Josh I thought I might be pregnant again. I think we were both a little surprised. Don't get me wrong, we know how this happens, and we knew there was a possibility, but we just didn't expect it to happen so easily and so quickly.

In our past experience, we had to really work at getting pregnant. I think in some ways we thought you really had to have perfect timing and be very intentional. Turns out...that isn't always true. Not to be too graphic, but, honestly, there were very few opportunities for us to get pregnant, if you get my drift.

At first I think we both were in shock. I'll admit that I was a little upset. I think that most of my fears related to loosing Lily as my baby. I was afraid that I would start to change how I feel about her. I hear this is common among second time moms and have been assured that it is totally possibly to love two as much as I love one!

Now we are starting to get excited. I know it won't be easy to have two little ones, but I also think it will be great for Lily to have a close in age sibling!

P.S. you may have notice that the blog was rather sparse in the last three months. Turns out I've been writing some posts, but just couldn't share them without giving away baby #2. I've published them now if you care to go back and read them.

Back to Work

Tuesday was my first teacher workday of the new school year. Returning to work has actually been surprisingly easy. I honestly think I was ready. Sometimes I feel like a bad mom, but I think I get tired of being home with Lily all day and appreciate her more when I can work during the day and then be home with her in the evenings and on the weekends. I know she is safe and happy at home with her Nanny Annie. Plus, I really like my job. I like the people I work with, and I love teaching. I always get a little giddy about the start of a new school year!

Lily's Dedication

Today was a very special day for my little duckling! Today she, along with six of her friends (our church is taking the "be fruitful and multiply" verse seriously :)) were dedicated. It was a touching service as Pastor CJ challenged us as parents to do our best to lead her down the right path while at the same time challenging the congregation to step along side of us in the journey.

As I looked around, I was blown away by how seriously my church family takes the "it takes a village" mentality. These are people who really have been our family, since family is far away. They brought dinner for two months when Lily was born (One even brought breakfast too!). Some stayed to hold and soothe her while we ate (which may have saved my sanity). There are times on Sunday I don't know who is holding Lily, but I know she is safe and there are ten mom's with eyes on her! In the last ten months, I have shared more lunches, dinners, coffees, and mothering discussions than I can count with many other moms. I know that I have a real fleet of people I can call at any time and with any need and they won't make me feel inadequate or ashamed. They will just be there. They love me, and they love Josh, and they love Lily.

I honestly don't know how people do it (by it I mean, parenthood, motherhood, marriage, life, everything) without community. I know that Josh and I are so blessed. So, to all of my community, Ekklesia and otherwise (because there are also quite a few of you out there that aren't Ekklesia, but still part of my "village"), Thank you and I love you, and I'm glad I have your help as I struggle to raise Lily the best way we know how!

**Case in point - Thanks to Nick Tripp for taking this picture when we didn't have enough hands to hold baby and camera!

The Beginning of the End, of Nursing That Is!

I just pulled the last of my frozen milk out of the freezer to thaw and feed Lily, and I can't help but be a little sad. I'm not totally giving up on nursing yet, but I'm past the pumping phase, which I know is the beginning of the end. When I start back to work next week, I'm not going to try to pump. I still plan to nurse morning and at bed time, but the rest of the day she will have formula until she is a year, then we'll transition to cow's milk.

There are several factors impacting the decision. One is that my pump is not working well. It fell in the back seat of my car and one of the prongs is bent which won't create good suction. Thus, when I'm pumping I'm not getting much. Another factor is just that she is getting older and eating a lot of food, so I know she is not as reliant on my milk. In fact, I'm not even sure about my supply and her satisfaction these days. I feel like when she does nurse (except at bed time) she only nurses for about five minutes on each side and then is done, then she still acts hungry. I've tried to get her to nurse longer, but she's just not super interested. :(

While knowing that this is the start of the end of nursing makes me sad, I also know it's a fact of her growing older. I'm sure this is the first of many leaps toward her independence, and a little piece of me is relieved not to have to worry as much about pumping, milk supply, and all that goes with that. Plus, it tempers the sadness to know that, come March, I'll have a new little one to nurse!

Little Sponge Brain!

Lily is definitely entering the "brain is a sponge" phase. She is constantly watching everything going on around her with they eye of a careful observer. And she's not just watching, she is learning! In just the last few weeks, I am finding myself constantly shocked by the things she can do that I didn't realize she could do.

Just to name a few, she can:
Stick out her tongue if asked (no demonstration needed)
Play patty cake
Brush her hair
Grab daddy's nose (and hold hers out to be "beeped")
Find and kiss her baby doll when asked
Kiss mommy or daddy when asked (if she wants to :)
Stand if holding onto any little thing (even a wall)
Climb the stairs (when daddy lets her)
Remove all the toys from her basket and climb in
Shake toys when asked
Say "bye" and "hey" like she knows what they mean
Regularly ask for "more" using sign language and saying "mo"
Say "nanana" for banana
Do sign language for milk and say "mi"
Say "dada" and "mama" regularly and with meaning
Eat almost anything cut into small pieces
Identify several toys by name

I still think I underestimate her sometimes and look at her as a little baby, but she is learning so much every day. I love all the learning, it is totally awesome! I have a feeling the next few months (and years) are going to be a blast!

Starting to Show & Telling People

So, we haven't totally gone public with Baby Hall #2 yet, but I think I'm starting to show! I know it's super early (I'm only almost 11 weeks), but if you knew me really well, you would notice. Most people, though, would probably just assume it's left over tummy from Lily. Perhaps in one way it is, but I still find that my roll of flab is turning into more of a round firm tummy. It's sort of exciting. It starts to make this pregnancy seem more real.

Since I'm starting to show some, it's going to be pretty much impossible to not tell people soon. Already most of our family and close friends know. Josh has told his work friends. I start back to work in a week and I'll tell my work friends then. I have to be honest. I'm a little nervous. I feel bad taking maternity leave twice in two years. I just pray the sub they find for me is better than the one from last year! I think that after next weeks twelve week check up we'll go "facebook" public!

Beach Baby (it's been a long time)

I know it has been a long time since I was on here. I had intentions of blogging about every adventure while we were at the beach last week, but ended up just not wanting to spend my time on the computer. This week, I've been busy with all the post-vacation stuff and enjoying my last few days before I go back to work.

We had a great week, despite Lily and I both having a cold. We didn't let it slow us down too much. We went to the beach every day and even took Lily Kayaking! She did great. She wasn't a huge fan of the big waves or of the sand, but she liked being on the beach with us. Luckily, because she didn't like the feel of the sand, she would stay on her blanket or in the pool. The inflatable pool which we filled with a bucket of sea water, was a huge hit. She would spend hours splashing in it. We ended up not even taking a pack n play to the beach for her.

The cabana we purchased got a bit of mixed reviews. It was really good to have the added shade, but it wasn't easy to put up, especially if it was windy. It took at least two people and at least five minutes. It was mostly too hot to actually be inside of it, but it was nice to put her pool and blanket in the shade of it for her to play. We used it several days, but also opted to leave it behind a few, especially since we mostly went to the beach late in the afternoon.

Other than the beach (where Josh caught lots of fish), a few trips around the village, and laying around the house, Kayaking was our only adventure. It was quite fun. We got a double Kayak and Josh did most of the paddling from the back seat. I sat in the front with Lily in the floor in front of me. She started out excited and talking, and ended up falling asleep. Adorable!

Overall it was a very fun and relaxing trip. I can't wait to do it again, but something tells me that, like most things, it will be very different as she gets older!

Ultrasound of Baby #2

Today we had our first ultrasound for Baby #2. I was excited about getting to see him or her for the first time and hear that precious heartbeat. I have to admit that I was a little disappointed. Not because anything was wrong. The "data" we got was all good. What made me leave there feeling down was the bedside manner of the ultrasound technician and the doctor. We decided to go to REX hospital instead of UNC because they could get us in a lot sooner, which was a mistake.

With Lily the people we saw always made us feel excited. At the first ultrasound, I remember them pointing out things and saying things like "listen to that strong heartbeat", or "look at those little leg buds". This technician, who wasn't even set up for an early ultrasound because she hadn't looked at my chart that closely, said absolutely nothing except to fuss at Josh who was trying to keep Lily happy. "Don't stand up, you might trip over that one electrical cord", "she can't eat cheerios in here", "I'm going to need you to be quiet", etc. She didn't even explain at all to me what she was doing (fortunately I've had an early, vaginal, ultrasound before or I'd have been really confused). She did play the heartbeat for maybe two seconds, but didn't say a word about it.

The doctor who came in introduced herself and said literally "It looks like you are about, um...how many weeks...oh eight...I mean seven." I honestly think that was all she was going to say, but I asked if everything looked good. Her response..."yes". Then I asked what the heart rate was. She looked at the technician who said "141". That was all...no more information was offered, so we left.

I was upset. I was sure, because of the way they made me feel, that something was wrong. But the reality is, as Josh helpfully pointed out on the way home, that all of the facts and details were good. There is a baby. It's in the right place. It's the right size. It has a heartbeat. All good. I was just feeling down because of the way their bedside manner influenced my perception of the facts. So, a word to all you medical professionals out there, know that how you treat your patients impacts their perception of their condition almost as much as the facts do!

The First Prenatal Visit - Take 2

Today we had our first prenatal visit for Baby Hall #2. It was pretty easy. They actually had a nurse call me last week and review my medical history so that part was already out of the way. The midwife (who was the same wonderful one who delivered Lily) remembered us and was very positive about seeing us again. I think that made us both a little more excited.

We reviewed the medical history and then did the physical part of the exam. Josh went with me, hoping they would either do a ultrasound or at least let us hear the heartbeat. Sadly, we weren't able to do either, but we do have an ultrasound scheduled for Friday. I'm looking forward to seeing and hearing this little one.

A Tooth!

Horray! Lily has the start of a tooth. Yesterday, I was doing the feel of her gums that has become a regular part of our day, and I felt the start of a tooth! It is the lower right front. I called Josh right away and made him feel it as soon as he got home!

I was honestly starting to think she wasn't going to get any. Most of her friends, who are younger than her, have been getting teeth for a while. While she was chewing and drooling for a while, she didn't seem to be having actual teeth coming through.

The great news is that it doesn't seem to be bothering her much, if at all! I have lots of teething toys, but she doesn't seem to interested in any of them. Yesterday, she had her first teething biscuit. I'm not a hundred percent sold on those things. She did really enjoy it and it kept her quite and occupied for a while we were out to dinner. But, they aren't supposed to be able to get choke size pieces, but Lily did. They are also incredibly messy! I might just stick to hunks of bagel.

Lily and the Kitties

Since Lily has become mobile, her chief goal is to capture our two cats. If one of them comes within her sight, she lets out an excited little squeal and is off after them. The funny thing is that the two of them have responded very differently to her advances.

Mr. Sophie seems to enjoy the attention. He is incredibly tolerant. He will let her grab him and roll around on him without even hardly flinching. He could easily escape, but chooses to stick around and let her wallow him. It's sort of cute, but I sometimes feel bad for the poor cat and have to intervene.

Nutmeg, on the other hand, is trying to kill Lily. I'm pretty sure. She does not like being gotten, but she is tricky about her escape. She doen't just flee and hide somewhere. No, she tries to lure Lily to her death. If we are downstairs, she will stay just out of Lily's reach and go to the steps where she stops about four steps up and flicks her tail to lure Lily to try to climb after her. If we are upstairs, she does the same thing, only going about four stairs down. I am convinced she knows that Lily can't navigate the stairs and is trying to get rid of the little pest that keeps chasing her! :)

Yep...Definitely Pregnant

Today I think I really started to feel pregnant for the first time. For the last couple of weeks, I've feel pretty normal. In fact, I sometimes forget that I'm pregnant. Not today.

I'm not sure if it's the heat or just the fact that its week seven (which is when I started feeling yucky with Lily), but I have felt sort of crummy all day today. Not horrible, just not great. I woke up at 4am when Josh got up to take his brother to the airport and had to brush my teeth because the taste of my own mouth made me feel a little ill. That slightly ill feeling persisted all day.

By the afternoon, I was struggling. I could hardly stand to do the grocery shopping and the fact my house smelled like cookies made me slightly nauseous. How sad is that? A friend baked me cookies at my house, and I couldn't appreciate it. I had that slightly nauseous extremely exhausted feeling that I remember very well from when Lily was little. All I wanted to do was rest. That's a lot harder though, now that I have Lily to entertain.

Luckily, I got to nap while Lily napped, which helped some. Then my wonderful husband came home and cooked me dinner, and my precious baby played sweetly in the floor, while I laid on the couch, which helped a lot! Still, I am pretty sure the next few weeks might be a bit tough.

Beach Baby: Advice Needed

In two weeks we are headed to Ocracoke! I am super excited. If you haven't been to Ocracoke, you should go. It is by far our favorite beach. It's quite remote, you have to take a ferry to get there, and never very crowded. In fact, there is absolutely no development on the beach itself. All of the hotels and rental houses are in the roughly one square mile Ocracoke Village. There is beach access in walking distance, but we always preferred to drive down the island a few miles, park on the side of the road, and walk over the dunes to our own private beach access! It is heaven.

In years past, we had a good system. We took a cooler, two beach chairs, an umbrella, a book, and some fishing gear. There we would remain most of the day. Me with my feet in the water, a book in my hands, and a cool drink. Josh, with his feet in the water, a fishing rod in his hands, and a cool drink. It was heaven.

Something tells me that this year will be different. I need the help of those of you who have take your little ones to the beach! I'm not even sure exactly what to expect with a little one. I know that we will not be able to spend long stretches of time on the beach. I'm thinking about getting one of these tents for her to play in on the beach. Does anyone have experience with one (or one they would want to loan us!)? I also, at the suggestion of a friend, got a cheap inflatable pool we can put seawater in for her to play in on the beach. Does anyone have any other helpful hints from past experiences?

Ox and Rabbit Soda and Sundries

This afternoon Josh, Lily, and I headed to 9th Street in Durham for some lunch at Elmo's. After lunch we walked down 9th street to get some coffee. Along the way, we stumbled upon Ox and Rabbit Soda and Sundries. What a delightful little store! As the name suggests it's part soda fountain and part unique boutique. We were too full from lunch and coffee to try the soda, but spent quite a while perusing the boutique.

I was drawn in by a display of Baggu reusable shopping bags in the window. For a while I had been wanting some of these easily foldable bags. We have a lot of reusable shopping bags, but they are somewhat cumbersome and I never can seem to remember to put them back in the car after unloading them. It also always seems like a lot of work to carry them and Lily around the store while shopping. I got three Baggu bags that fold up very small and zip into a little pouch which will keep them handy in the diaper bag or my purse! Perfect!

However, I have to tell you that it was very hard to restrict myself to just that one small purchase. Ox and Rabbit had so many other cute things. Along with unique stationary and all sorts of home goods, they have a large variety of things for kids. The adorable sock puppets and a cool place mat for kids that they can draw on over and over again and easily erase were probably the two most tempting things for me, but Josh was drawn to a drawing of a banjo!

I'll admit that their prices are a bit high, but not exorbitant for such interesting finds. I'll definitely venture there again when I'm looking for a cute gift or wanting an old fashion soda!

Fantastic Finger Foods!

I am learning that Lily will eat almost anything that isn't on a baby spoon! She has recently been starting to reject more and more of the "baby food". I'm not sure if it is the texture or watered down flavors, or just that she wants the independence of feed herself, but she will not eat pureed peas from a spoon, but give her some as finger food and she goes to town!

Her meals today included finger food blueberries, Lima beans, strawberries, pea, zucchini, cheerios, and whole wheat bread. Over the weekend she had so many different things I'm not sure I even know about them all. I know she had re-fried beans, rice, guacamole, salsa, peach frozen yogurt, key lime pie, baked beans, and who knows what else my friends and family didn't tell me about. She chowed down on it all.

I have to admit that I was afraid it would make her tummy upset. I told Josh (after he was feeding her from his plate at a Mexican restaurant) that he was in charge of diapers for the next forty-eight hours. In reality, though, it didn't seem to impact her digestive system at all. It appears our little one has a tummy of steal!

All of this is good news. I would love to be able to just feed her what we are eating from the table! I realize, of course, that I do need to be careful about how much fat, salt, and sugar she is getting, but I should probably watch how much of that I'm eating as well! Anyone out there have good finger food suggestions?

Family Photo Fun!

A few weeks ago my friend, and very talented photographer, Star came to visit. She, Lily, and I headed up to Virginia to visit our families and take some pictures. The main goal was a photo shoot with Lily and my two year old nephew, her cousin, Jesse. It was a bit of an adventure, but the photos we got are worth it!

After much debate we decided that the best location was my grandparents farm over in Shiloh. It really is beautiful and has many nice backdrops (white farmhouse, porch swing, old fence, barn, goats, horse, and lots of green!). The only problem was that Jesse was not in a mood to have his picture taken.

In most of the shots on the farm he as a bit of a scowl on his face. Lily, ever the ham (and too young to really know better) is smiling away. We did manage to get a couple cute ones of them separate, and maybe two usable ones of them together before heading out to get lunches and naps and try the photo shoot again.

Later that night, after everyone slept and ate, we did have a bit more luck. We were able to get some really cute shots around my mom's house and the boat docks. These are some of my favorites! (*You can check out the rest on facebook by liking Lil Paperia Photo. They probably look better the way Star has them edited, but I think square really works best for blogging...sorry!)

Don't be Judgy (and Lily's 9 Month Check Up)

Today was Lily's nine month check up. She is doing great. Still tall (29 inches - 99th percentile) but thinning out a bit (18lbs 5oz - 50th percentile) due to all the moving around. She is the picture of perfect health and even tolerated her shot and anemia test fairly well.

I had an interesting realization at the doctor's today, though.

It was really crowded this morning. The office was full of kids waiting for their check up (our pediatrician, who I love, intentionally schedules the well visits in the morning and sick visits in the afternoon to limit contagion). A mother with her daughter, who was probably about four, were in front of me in line to check in. I heard her explain to the receptionist that she didn't have an appointment, but she really needs to see a doctor right away because her daughter has a mosquito bite that is swelling on her face.

I have to admit. My first thoughts were judgy. Really...a mosquito bite? You rush your daughter to the doctor for a mosquito bite? I have ten mosquito bites right now! I can't even see it from here! It can't be worth the time and expense of a doctor visit! How silly! I could tell the people in line behind me and in the waiting room were thinking the same thing. I could tell that the receptionist was thinking the same thing, although she handled it quite well and told the woman they would work her in (this is part of why I love this doctor).

Selfishly, I thought about my busy day. I thought about all I had to do and how I had my appointment scheduled three months ago. I thought about how I would be upset if they "worked her in" before I got to see the doctor. I thought about how "unfair" it would be if her mosquito bite somehow meant we had to spend more time waiting.

As I sat there waiting (just a few minutes) for my appointment, though, I got to thinking. Am I really that different from this mom? Am I not a worry wart sometimes (see cartoon!)? Don't I sometimes start to freak out over a little bump, or a "strange" diaper, or a "gooky" eye? The difference for me is Josh. He tells me chill out. He keeps me from freaking out. What if this woman doesn't have a husband? What is if she doesn't have a mom, or sister, or friend to ask? What if her daughter has a special medical condition where a bug bite could be a big deal?

Bottom line...I don't know her story. I don't know her situation. I should not be judgy. I should just count my own blessings!

9 Months - "Never Grow Up"

Today Lily is nine months old! I know I say this all the time, but it really does seem like time is flying by. It's probably hormonal, but I am feeling super sappy and sentimental today. Yesterday, Josh made me (and yes, it was by force) listen to the Taylor Swift song "Never Grow Up". It is like torture for me at the moment. It is impossible for me to listen to without sobbing. This is the first verse and chorus:


Your little hands wrapped around my finger
And it's so quiet in the world tonight
Your little eyelids flutter cause you're dreaming
So I tuck you in and turn on your favorite nightlight

To you, everything's funny
You got nothing to regret
I'd give all I have honey
If you could stay like that

Oh darling don't you ever grow up,
don't you ever grow up
Just stay this little
Oh darling don't you ever grow up,
don't you ever grow up
It could stay this simple

I won't let nobody hurt you
Wont let no one break your heart
No one will desert you
Just try to never grow up
Never grow up

Seriously...just posting that, I'm sitting here with tears streaming. I can't even conceive of the next two verses (they deal with being a rebellious teenager and moving out on your own). It is mind boggling to me how a young girl like Swift, who is not a mother, can so capture what I feel for my daughter. If you haven't heard the song, you should. It's beautiful...just be prepared to cry!

Hatley on Zulily!

Need some good jammies for your little one? Check out the Hatley sale on Zulily!

A few months ago, I posted about "Lily's" favorite Hatley pajamas. Someone gave us the adorable flamingo coverall. It is super cute, fits for a long time (she still wears the 3-6month one...barely!), and is made with ultra-soft cotton and chemical-free dyes. I love it and have wanted for a while to buy her some more, but they are really expensive. Normally they are $33. I just can't justify spending that on a pair of baby pj's.

BUT...today, Hatley showed up on Zulily! Remember Zulily, it's that bargain site I posted about a week ago. Hatley pajamas are on Zulily for only $13! This is bad....this is really bad...I currently have four pairs in my "shopping basket" (the four pictured). Granted, my total is less that what two pair would cost normally and they are in various sizes for her to grow into, and one is a gift (not for anyone specific, just to have as a gift for someone someday) but still, do I (or I should say, does Lily) really need four pair of pajamas?

What to buy...what to buy?!?! :)

Sneaking in the Greens!

Lily is starting to be a bit of a picky eater. She has, for example, figured out that peaches are more delicious than spinach. At first, she would eat anything I fed her. I'm not sure if that was because I was feeding her from jars and all of that food is more bland (she still eats anything from a jar), or if she was just not yet discriminating in her tastes.

Now that I'm making her food, she has shown a distinct preference for the sweet! She will gobble down the fruit, and tolerates carrots and sweet potatoes. The greens, however, she will not eat alone. I've tried zucchini, broccoli, peas, and spinach. She gags with them all. If, however, I make a blend, say blueberries and broccoli (I know...weird), she will eat it.

I'm not sure if this is a good move or not. Part of me wants her to enjoy the vegetables on their own, for their savory flavors. I've tried mixing them with cereal or yogurt and adding some savory spices (cinnamon, cumin, or paprika), but she still won't eat but a few bites. The foodie in me knows that salt will make them taste better, but they (whoever they are) say not to give salt to babies.

Then there is the part of me that just wants her to get the good nutrients and doesn't care if she has them mixed with sweets or not. This morning she gobbled down her favorite breakfast of applesauce with yogurt and cinnamon without even noticing the spoon full of spinach I added!

Any of you baby food making mom's out there have any thoughts?

Happy Father's Day!

I want to wish a very Happy Father's Day to two of the best fathers I know.

My Dad - When I was growing up, my dad was the dad that was always around, and it was cool. He chaperoned field trips, came to school to help with projects, and was even my band booster president (yes, I was in the band, and color guard, and it was cool at my school!). My dad is the type of man who would do anything to help anyone. He's a volunteer fire fighter, teaches boating safety classes, and was instrumental in getting water quality testing started on our lake. Some of my most fond memories of my child hood are the nights when my mom had things to do and dad was in charge. We would get fried chicken and go on a wayside picnic, make grilled Hersey bar sandwiches, or (and these are some of the very best memories) go out on the lake and go swimming! My dad is the kind of guy that doesn't say a lot, but when he does it's usually funny and full of love. I know that I am very blessed to have him for a dad and Lily is very blessed to have "Deano" for a granddad.

Josh - My husband, along with being a great husband, is an amazing father. Through all of our fertility struggles he was very supportive and encouraging. When I would want to start saying "if" he would say "when". When we found out we were expecting Lily, his joy rivaled mine and helped me overcome some of my fear. He fully supported my desire for a natural labor, even though I think he thought I was crazy, and was an amazing birth partner. His level head when something is amiss with Lily is a very good balance to my tendency to over analyze and worry. And he loves his daughter...man does he love his daughter. There are few things in the world that give me as much joy as watching them together. The light in both of their eyes when they are smiling at each other, or her laugh when he makes faces at her, is the best thing on Earth. I have no idea how single parents do it. I need his partnership, love, support, and sanity. I know Lily and I are so blessed to have him.

**Sadly, Lily and I are out of town for her first father's day. We made plans with a friend far in advance, not realizing it was Father's day weekend, and Josh is too busy with work to join us. I feel fairly terrible about taking her away, but promise to use FaceTime so Lily can see and hear her daddy! The flip side is that our plans have taken us to Pulaski, so we do get the spend the day with Lily's two granddads.

Shopping - Online vs. In Store

When buying things, especially things for Lily, I always struggle with whether I should order online or go to the store. Josh loves ordering things online and would never go to stores if he could get away with it. I am also a bit of an Amazon junkie. It's nice to be able to read reviews and they usually have the best prices. I also love having things arrive at my door. Still, I frequently need to go see things in person before I can commit to buying them. I want to feel the fabric and see the exact colors. I also struggle a bit with the packaging waste that comes with online purchases. It's a tough choice. What do you prefer? Please vote in the poll on the right!

Deliveries!

Today was a big day at our house with two deliveries. We got packages from UPS and Fed-Ex!

The first delivery was Lily's big girl car seat. We decided to go with the Evenflo Triumph 65. It was the Consumer Report top pick, and I have a friend who uses it and really likes it. My two favorite features (aside from how safe it is) are the machine washable cover and the easy twist to tighten straps. It will also convert from rear to front facing and she can use it until she is 65 pounds! So far, in our living room, she seems to like it!

The other delivery was two new toys for Lily! We have recently realized that Lily is starting to get bored with her toys. My nanny suggested we get her some sort of shape sorter and maybe something that made music or taught numbers. After some searching, we decided we really loved the classic Tupperware sorter, so we ordered one of those.

At one point I'm pretty sure I said I really didn't want my baby to have toys that make sounds and have flashing lights. I'm not sure if I thought it was too much stimulation, just didn't want to have to hear it, or didn't like the waste...must not matter now. Well, it turns out that babies actually really like sounds and lights. So, we found a really cute baby piano that teaches numbers and makes sound. I must admit part of why I like it is that you can turn the volume low!